Friday, September 19, 2008

Thankful

Earlier today, I had an exchange with someone that showed me how much I've grown.

Who this person was, my relationship with the person and what was particularly said isn't important. What's important to know is that the person insulted me in a way that would offend anyone of average sensibility - maybe even those who are less sensitive than most. What's also important - and the indicator of my growth - was my response: "Thank you."

Preceding the thank you and following the insult was a very brief assessment of my mind state. You know, the first reaction is usually the right one - indicative of what needs to be done or said, of how you genuinely feel. And what I felt was an immensely positive feeling. And so I thanked the person.

Even as I write this I think it's a bit odd how everything went down. I know the insulter thought so as well - indicated by looking at me like I was odd and then subsequently shrinking away. I think its odd that my initial feeling was so positive - afterward I felt a bit of anger and a bit saddened that this person - who really should be the last person to insult me or call me a name - acted in this way. But this isn't a new situation with this particular person - it's rather old - and something I've had trouble walking away from due to the nature of our relationship. It's also not new to me that this person is incredibly negative. But what I've come to realize, as I assess the situation, is that I've learned how to respond to negativity with positivity. For me, that's huge!

About five years ago I experienced something that ultimately lead to me to deciding to love myself a bit more. From that, a lot of other changes came about, including a revamping of my mindset - from the negative and the positive. I feel like I'm still experiencing the revamp, but it's gotten easier. I feel like the more I seek positivity the more that it finds me in unexpected ways. Just goes to show that being focused on a particular thing tends to attract more of it your life. Your mindset shapes your reality, you know? Still, I have negative experiences, like anyone else, but I find that I'm able to flip the negative into the positive a whole lot easier now than I used to. Just goes to show that the more you do something, the easier it gets!

But before tonight, I've never responded with positivity in the face of negativity so instantaneously. It's a blessing. I am truly thankful for the experience.

More about loving yourself, later.

1 comment:

alwayzambitious said...

Kudos to you, keep striving.